Tag Archives: parenting

Middle age mindset

We had what I consider to be a 1/2 day of academics. I was a bit in slow motion with instruction. The younger guys had a few math lessons and quizzes. My oldest studied several subjects independently. The contractors were attaching the last few gutters onto our house. The weather was gorgeous outside, so we studied and played at the same time. I tried a yoga class at the gym this evening and didn’t realize how tight my muscles were until I started stretching. Decent workout, but I really enjoyed the quietness and stillness of the breathing and stretching. Made me want to join a monastery, no joke. I may get my kids involved in yoga. The class made me think about their fast-paced days, and I’m not so sure that’s the best thing. They need to be still sometimes just like we do.
Middle age mindset-yes, what does that mean? I was having a discussion with my oldest this evening. He was angry and upset about some things that had been said to him by friends. I listened and we discussed many topics concerning the situation. I thought about myself and the stage of life that I’m in called middle age after talking with him. I’ve found myself in my 40’s not really caring about certain things in life anymore like I would have when I was his age. After going through medical school, having four children, and now raising them while my body changes and reminds me of such, I just don’t care anymore if someone would have issues with me. You get somewhat comfortable in who you are as a person and don’t really fret about stuff that’s not relevant to your life. I see that same attitude in many middle-age mothers. I wish I could pass that insight onto my son, but he’s got his own growing pains to do. More to keep my middle-age finger on.
Off to prep…

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There should be a fire or a large amount of blood

I’ve been reading a bit on various parenting styles trying to gather helpful information for myself as we enter the middle school years.
Here’s one thing you won’t find as the norm in our household-screaming. Screaming or yelling has always made me nervous in a home. I did not have that kind of environment growing up, so maybe that’s why I don’t like it. Maybe it’s because I’m a physician by trade, and by the mere requirement of the job, one cannot become unnecessarily excited in order to care for the patient. You have to always remain calm and controlled. Maybe a fire or large volumes of blood might demand a bit of haste on my part or even raising my voice a notch higher could be needed then, but that’s about it. Maybe it’s because I don’t envision my Creator as being a yeller. Regardless, I find yelling in the home unnatural, unnerving and unnecessary. I try to promote a peaceful environment in the schoolroom although I do get frustrated or stressed when I’m not teaching effectively or I’m not managing the day or studies in a productive manner. I do get tears from my daughter at times and complaints from the boys when they don’t want to read their history or work on their math pages. I just don’t find that yelling is required. They do what I ask them to do because we have a mutual respect for one another combined with their recognition that my requests have their best interests at heart. We discuss the reasons behind my requests frequently. They might not like the requests, but they get it. No mind games are needed. Have I ever yelled at my children? Yes. Is it my norm? No.

Off to prep for tomorrow-an Eagle Mother’s work is never done.

P.S.-My mother-in-law is pictured below celebrating at the Sunrise Service, but the picture makes me giggle because it reminds me of some commercial you’d see for feminine protection or a yogurt product or something. Then, my picture makes me look like I need the product she’s selling.  Too funny..I don’t do mornings well.

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“Are the French outdoing Americans at Parenting?”-NPR News..

http://www.npr.org/2012/02/14/146867488/are-the-french-outdoing-americans-at-parenting

Assuming this article to be accurate, I love the fact that French parents emphasize the importance of themselves having “me time”.  Big fan of that idea, especially as a homeschooler.  You can become so consumed in this “job” of homeschooling that you forget the importance of doing something for yourself.  That’s not selfishness.  That’s vital refreshment.

Would your student benefit from the “gap year”?

Interesting topic…Lots of good articles to read on the subject.

http://www.interimprograms.com/AboutInterim/Counselors.asp

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,2015783,00.html

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/24260521/ns/today-parenting_and_family/t/should-your-child-have-gap-year-college/